


So Cruel

by livwrites



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Community: HPFT, F/M, Feminist Themes, Hate to Love, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-05-30 20:58:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6440266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livwrites/pseuds/livwrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If he seems too good to be true, he probably is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Look Not in My Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: This chapter is set in March. The title of this chapter is taken from the poem "Look not in my eyes, for fear" by A.E. Housman.

Lucy Weasley's mother, Audrey, had told her several times that if a guy seems like he's too good to be true, he probably is. Lucy had never really paid attention to her when she'd said this, thinking that she wasn't going to have any problem with guys. In her view, she wouldn't have anything to worry about when she got to Hogwarts; books and female friends were better, in her opinion.  
  
So by the time she got to Hogwarts she had completely forgotten the instructions her mother had given her. Not that she really needed them until seventh year; most of her Hogwarts life up to that point was taken up with schoolwork and her female friends.  
  
Lucy did have mild crushes on guys, but they never seemed to return her affections and she never ventured to hit on any of them or demonstrate her feelings in every way. Her Ravenclaw mind knew that if she didn't do anything the boy would never know she liked him, but she didn't think that being in a relationship with a guy (if it even amounted to that) was as anywhere near as important as finishing school and getting a good job after Hogwarts.  
  
It was around sixth year that she found her beliefs shifting: she still wanted to get a good job, but a boyfriend would be nice too. Looking back, years later, she realized that this change was more a manifestation of being the only one of her friends who was single, and the only one of her family who was as well. Elaine, Rosalyn, Alicia, and Rolanda were all in relationships; Elaine with a girl, which might explain why her relationship was so happy: there was a lot of common ground between her and her girlfriend.  
  
As an adult, she realized that she should just have ignored these feelings and focused solely on her schoolwork. Maybe if she had just waited until adulthood to find a guy the whole business with Roderick Grinderford wouldn't have happened.  
  
*  
  
Now that she was engaged, Lucy didn't like thinking of Roderick Grinderford. For one, her fiance was so much better than he was, and there was no need to compare. Second, thinking of him reminded her of how stupid she had been, how easily he had tricked her. If only she had asked around, maybe it wouldn't have happened.  
  
She could still remember their conversation after she had found out, down by the boathouse, in front of the lake, at night. It was a romantic setting, with the lights from the castle reflecting off the surface of the lake, but neither of them were in the mood for romance.  
  
Lucy was furious: at herself, at Roderick, and at her friends for not telling her the truth. She knew, deep within herself, that her friends hadn't really done anything wrong, that the blame for this fell squarely on her shoulders, and on Roderick's, but she didn't want to admit to herself that it was her fault.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked him coldly, drawing her cloak around herself; it was only March, and while the ground might have been magically thawed it didn't make the air any warmer.  
  
All his charm, the very thing that had made her fall for him, was gone. At least he had the decency to look embarrassed.  
  
"I-" he began, and then stopped.  
  
"You what?" Lucy demanded. Any nervousness she had felt earlier about this conversation had vanished. All she wanted was answers - she was done with him anyways, so it wasn't like there was any pressure to try and save their relationship.  
  
"I'm sorry," he mumbled, hands at his sides, staring at the ground.  
  
"Well I'm done," Lucy snapped, brushing past him to go back up to the castle. "You've had since October to tell me about this, and you didn't."  
  
She didn't look back as she walked back up the castle, but as she didn't her any footsteps behind her she assumed that Roderick Grinderford, who a week before she had thought was the most wonderful guy ever, was still standing where she had left him, feeling guilty as hell. Or at least she hoped he was.


	2. But She Had Somewhere To Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is set in August.
> 
> The title of this chapter is taken from the song "Jenny Was a Friend of Mine" by The Killers.

Lucy stood in her bedroom staring down at her purse, which was resting on the bed. It was a big, fat bag, now stuffed with Galleons so she could go shopping. She was looking forward to being able to go without her parents and younger sister there to pester or embarrass her.  
  
She grabbed the purse off the bed and headed downstairs into the living room, where her parents were.  
  
"I'm going shopping with Rosalyn now," she said to her dad, who was sitting in his chair with a pile of parchment from work. He grunted in reply as she Flooed to the Leaky Cauldron.  
  
The Cauldron, as usual, was busy, and Lucy spent a fair amount of time looking around for her friend before spotting her, sitting by the fireplace, talking to some guy Lucy didn't recognize. He didn't look like someone she'd want to know, either, and she wondered where Rosalyn had met this guy.  
  
"And then I guess I'll have to go into Knockturn Alley to pick some up," she heard Rosalyn saying as she walked towards them. "I'll have to see if I can meet up with Roderick."  
  
"Hey, Rosalyn," Lucy said tentatively, reaching them. "I don't think I've met you before?" she said, turning to the guy. "I'm Lucy Weasley."  
  
The guy nodded slowly, looking a bit uncomfortable. "Nice to meet you, Lucy. I, unfortunately, have to leave right now. See you later, hopefully." He got up from where he was sitting and all but ran out into the street.  
  
Lucy stared after him, confused. "Who was that?" she asked Rosalyn. "He seems pretty weird to me."  
  
Rosalyn stood up and waved dismissively. "Just some guy I met at a party at the beginning of the summer. I don't really spend time with him at all." She threw her purse over her shoulder. "Ready to go?"  
  
"Yes," Lucy said. "Where are we going first?"  
  
"I was thinking the apothecary," Rosalyn said. "We can do Flourish and Blotts last. I don't want to carry a bunch of books around everywhere we go."   
  
 _Sounds reasonable_ , Lucy thought, and didn't say anything else. They silently shopped all day, stopping for lunch at a restaurant next door to the apothecary.  
  
"Now," Rosalyn said, wiping her fingers on her napkin, "before we go to Flourish and Blotts there's one little detour I'd like to make."  
  
"Okay, sure," Lucy said, having forgotten completely about the unnamed guy and Rosalyn's conversation with her earlier in the day. "Where?"  
  
"It's a little shop in Knockturn Alley," Rosalyn said nonchalantly. "I just need to pick up a little thing for this school year."  
  
"Why Knockturn Alley?" Lucy asked as they walked towards its entrance. "Just what are you getting that you can't get in a more... safe part of town?"  
  
Rosalyn shook her head and avoided the question. "Come on, Lucy, it's not as bad as you seem to think it is. Just trust me."  
  
Lucy started to get a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach but said nothing, trusting that her friend wouldn't be doing anything illegal or outright dangerous.  
  
Rosalyn led her into a small, dingy shop at the end of the alley, tucked into a corner. It couldn't have been more inconspicuous if a Disillusionment Charm had been placed on it.  
  
Lucy stepped in and looked around her. The store front was one room with a staircase in the corner, empty except for a chair against a wall. The wood floor was covered in a layer of dust and the whole place looked abandoned.  
  
"I'll just be a minute," Rosalyn said, disappearing up the staircase. With nothing else to do, Lucy brushed dust off of the chair and sat down, waiting for her friend to get back.  
  
Lucy sat there for what seemed like five minutes, waiting for Rosalyn to return. She didn't, and before she could wonder what was taking her so long the door opened and a boy entered.  
  
He was tall, with black hair that he kept swept back from his forehead. He was good-looking, in a brooding dark-and-dangerous kind of way that always seemed to be in the books Lucy scorned: brainless girl falls in love with dark, mysterious asshole. And this dark, mysterious potential asshole looked about her age.    
  
"What are you doing here?" he demanded, seeing her there. His hand flew to the pocket of his robes, presumably to where his wand was.  
  
Lucy started. She had expected a significantly politer response. "I'm Lucy Weasley," she said quickly. "I'm just waiting for my friend Rosalyn. She just said she was getting something."  
  
"Oh," he said, taking his hand out of his pocket. "Hello, Lucy. I'm Roderick Grinderford." He made no move to shake her hand or apologize for his rudeness earlier.  
  
"Nice to meet you," she said, trying open hostility out of her voice. If he couldn't be bothered to be polite neither could she.  
  
"So," he said, "are you just shopping, or did Roz drag you down here for a special trip?"  
  
At first Lucy couldn't figure out who he was talking about when he referred to "Roz" because nobody that she knew called Rosalyn that. When she realized, she looked down at the bags of school materials down at her feet, decided that he was probably trying to make small talk to fill the awkward silence that would otherwise linger until Rosalyn came back with whatever she was getting.  
  
"Just shopping," Lucy said. "Things that we need for Hogwarts, you know." She didn't really want to talk to him and hoped that he would get the message and stop bugging her.  
  
He didn't.  
  
"Oh, you go to Hogwarts?" Lucy mentally cursed him. "What house are you in?"  
  
"Ravenclaw," she muttered. Oh, please, Roselyn, she thougnt, please finish whatever you're doing and come back downstairs so they could leave. She didn't want to listen to this guy any longer.    
  
"Oh, cool," Grinderford said. "I'm in Slytherin myself." There was a succession of creaking noises at the top of the staircase and both their eyes flew to Rosalyn, who was standing with a giant bag of what looked like plant leaves.  
  
"Sorry about the wait, Lucy," she said apologetically. "That took a lot longer than I thought." She bounded down the stairs and spotted Grinderford. "Hey, Rod! How are you? I see you met Lucy."  
  
"Yes, I did," Grinderford said. Lucy noticed that he was acting a lot more polite now that Rosalyn was back.  
  
"Well, see you later, I guess," Rosalyn said, bending over to stuff the bag of leaves into her own bag. "Come on, Lucy, let's finish our shopping."  
  
"So," Lucy said as they walked towards the passageway between Knockturn Alley and Diagon Alley, "Roderick Grinderford...." She left the sentence unfinished.  
  
"Oh, him?" Rosalyn said. "I met him at a party at the beginning of July. He's really nice."  
  
"I don't think so," Lucy replied, shaking her head. "I think he's a bit of an asshole." She looked at Rosalyn's bag, which was majorly bulging out. "What did you even buy anyways?"  
  
"Just a bunch of plant leaves," Rosalyn said dismissively. "Nothing major."  
  
"If it's nothing major then why did we have to come all the way to Knockturn Alley so you could pick it up?" They were back in Diagon Alley. "And how come I wasn't invited to this party you went to at the beginning of July?"  
  
"Oh, you were on vacation in France then," Rosalyn said. "I didn't think you'd want to cancel that just to come with us."  
  
Lucy nodded, unconvinced, but didn't say anything else. They went to Flourish and Blotts and bought the books they needed for the upcoming year in silence, and then parted ways, promising to sit together on the train on the way to Hogwarts at the beginning of September.  
  
Lucy Flooed home, feeling very out of place. Rosalyn had never wanted to go to Knockturn Alley before. She'd always scorned the place, saying that everything sold there was either illegal or dangerous, just like the people who frequented it. And now she was going there, to pick up a bunch of plant leaves. It didn't make sense at all.  
  
Putting her school supplies in a corner of the kitchen, Lucy went up to her room, unsure about Rosalyn and everything that had happened. Sitting down on her bed, she decided to go talk with her cousin Lily the next day. Lily was training to be an Auror. She'd recognize whatever plant Rosalyn had bought.  
  
Lucy felt a little bit better.  


	3. Why Don't We Go Talk About It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place in August. The chapter title is a lyric from the song "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane.

The next day Lucy tried to Floo her cousin to see if they could meet up. According to Lily's boyfriend she had already left for training and would be gone for the rest of the week. They would, however, be at Sunday brunch with Grandma and Grandpa Weasley.  
  
Lucy decided she could wait to talk to her then. It would be the last Sunday before they went back to Hogwarts, and Lucy wanted to cherish her remaining week and a half before freedom.  
  
By reading as many books as possible, of course. She curled up outside in a hammock with a light blanket, a pile of books, and a bowl of snacks. It was extremely relaxing - nothing to worry about (Rosalyn, Grinderford, and their shopping trip had been pushed out of her mind until she could talk about it with Lily) and she could sit in the sun, with a slight breeze, and read about Aurors in the First Wizarding War and the history of Quidditch and Gellert Grindelwald's rise to power and anything that interested her (which was almost everything).  
  
That Sunday, she, her parents, and her younger sister Molly (who at 10 was yet to start Hogwarts) Flooed to the Burrow. They were the last ones to arrive as everyone else already seemed to be talking and mingling with each other.  
  
Lucy searched for her cousin Lily and eventually found her outside, Butterbeer in hand, talking with her Aunt Angelina about Quidditch. Of course. Although Lily was training to be an Auror, she still loved Quidditch and watched as many games as she could without falling behind in training.  
  
"Hey, Lily, Aunt Angelina," Lucy said shyly. "How are you two?"  
  
"Great!" Aunt Angelina replied enthusiastically. "We're just trying to decide on teams for a Quidditch game we're going to have later today. You want to join?"  
  
"No thanks." Lucy shook her head. While she liked watching Quidditch she'd never enjoyed playing it and had hated the few flying lessons she'd had in first year. "Lily, can I talk to you for a second?"  
  
"Of course," Lily said, taking a sip from her Butterbeer. "About what?"  
  
"Well," Lucy said slowly, looking around her, "can we sit down, first?" They found chairs at the end of the lawn by the broom shed and sat in them. "So," Lucy began, "earlier this week I went shopping with one of my friends, for school supplies and stuff like that." Lily nodded. "And... I don't really know how to explain this, but... She's the kind of person who would never ever ever do anything wrong. Ever. Like, she used to stay away from Knockturn Alley and would never think of going in there in a million years. But then when we went out shopping..." Lucy brushed her hair behind her ear with her hand. "She told me she wanted to make a detour before we went to Flourish and Blotts and dragged me to this really seedy shop in the back of Knockturn Alley."  
  
Lily looked extremely concerned. "A really seedy shop? In the back of Knockturn Alley? Do you remember the shop name? I can bring it up at work if you want me to. I know I'm only in training but it definitely can't hurt to pass it on if you think it's necessary."  
  
Lucy hesitated. "I don't know. She came out carrying what looked like a bundle of plant leaves that she stuffed in her bag. I don't know what they were and she didn't tell me. I didn't ask. I just wanted to leave." She didn't mentioned the Grinderford boy she had met. His name seemed a little familiar, but she wasn't sure why. He had said he was in Slytherin. Had she seen him around Hogwarts?  
  
"What did these leaves look like?" Lily asked. "There are a lot of restricted plants that can only be possessed by the Ministry, St Mungo's, or Hogwarts. If it's one of those, it's illegal, but if it's not on the list there's probably nothing we can do, even if your friends are using them in ways that they shouldn't."  
  
"Like as drugs?" Lucy asked. She hoped not. She'd originally never been able to seen Rosalyn doing anything like that, but after their shopping trip she didn't know. And Grinderford... she hadn't had more than a five minute conversation with him, but she already knew that he wasn't someone she'd want to get to know any more than she did currently.  
  
"Yes," Lily replied, interrupting Lucy's train of thought. "It depends on the plant, but many plants can be used as drugs, depending on what part of the plant is used and how they're used."  
  
"Well," Lucy said, and she described the plant to her cousin.  
  
Lily nodded and said, "It sounds like Mandrake leaves. They're not illegal to own, per se, but it's officially frowned upon. I'd stay away friend of yours from now on, I think."  
  
Lucy exhaled with relief. She didn't want to know that she'd been involved in the purchase of something illegal. "That's great. Thanks, Lily."  
  
"No problem." Lily smiled and got up. "I'm gonna go get another Butterbeer. You want one?"


	4. How Did It End Up Like This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place in September. The chapter title is a lyric from the song "Mr Brightside" by The Killers.

Lucy woke up with a groan and looked at her watch. It was 7 o'clock in the morning. Sighing, she rolled out of bed and pulled a shirt on. It was September 1st, which meant that her last summer of peace was over. She would have to go back to Hogwarts and deal with all of the drama that happened there. Boyfriends, girlfriends, all the issues surrounding them. Lucy didn't care about any of that. She just wanted to get good marks on her NEWTs and find a good job.

This year, apparently, she was going to have to deal with the Mandrake leaves that Rosalyn was involved in. That and also potentially Roderick Grinderford. Lucy shook her head as she dragged her trunk down the stairs. She wasn't sure why Rosalyn liked him at all or spent time around him. She'd spent ten minutes with him and knew that he was an extremely unpleasant person who she didn't want to be involved with any more than she absolutely had to.

And while, Lucy thought, Mandrake leaves might not be explicitly illegal she was going to try to follow Lily's advice and find new friends. Hopefully, the rest of her friend group wasn't also into the leaves and whatever else might come with it.

Lucy set her trunk down on the space beside the front door and went into the kitchen for a quick bite of food. Her dad was sitting at the kitchen table, already in his work robes, reading over a report of some sort.

"Morning, Lucy," he said, reaching for his glass of pumpkin juice.

"Morning, Dad." Lucy grabbed an orange out of a basket on the counter and began to peel it. "What time are we leaving for King's Cross?"

He set his glass down. "Well, actually," he said, "your mother has already left for work and I have to leave in a few minutes. Since you have your Apparition licence your mother and I thought you could go by yourself."

Lucy put a piece of orange in her mouth and chewed. "Okay," she said, "whatever."

"Are you okay doing that?" he asked.

"Yeah," Lucy said. "I'm fine." She shoved the rest of the orange in her mouth and went back up to her room.

Looking around, she realized there wasn't anything she wanted to take with her that she hadn't already packed. All the books, clothes, and other random crap that she wanted with her at Hogwarts were already in her trunk.

At 7:45, Lucy went back downstairs, grabbed her trunk, and Apparated directly to Platform 9 3/4. She dragged her trunk onto the train and looked for a place to sit, keeping in mind what Lily had told her about Rosalyn.

As she got to the middle of the train Lucy saw Rosalyn and everyone else and was about to pass their compartment and find somewhere else to sit when Alicia saw her through the glass.

"Lucy!" she said, standing up and opening the compartment door. "How was your summer?"

"It was okay," Lucy replied, pretending to be enthusiastic. While she genuinely liked Alicia, she didn't want to spend time with Rosalyn.

"Here, let me help you." Alicia grabbed Lucy's trunk and shoved it under the seats.

As Lucy sat down with a book in her lap (an epic novel about an international Auror task force) Rosalyn pulled her bookbag onto the space beside her.

"So, guys," she said casually, "guess what I bought two weeks ago? I was saving it to share with you."

"What?" Elaine asked.

Rosalyn pulled the Mandrake leaves out of her bag. "Mandrake leaves," she said. "I bought them off of one of Roderick's friends in Knockturn Alley."

Yeah, and you left me stuck with Roderick while you were doing it, Lucy thought bitterly.

"Who wants to try a bit?" Rosalyn asked.

"No, thanks." Lucy opened her book to where she had left off. "Even if I wanted to, it's too risky on the train. A teacher could pop in at any time."

Rosalyn thought a bit. "Yeah, you're probably right. After Sorting, maybe. This is our last year guys. We have to make the most of it."

Rosalyn apparently meant making the most of it by doing borderline illegal things and drinking, which Lucy wasn't interested in at all. When the Sorting ceremony finished Rosalyn and everyone else went down to the boathouse to try the Mandrake leaves (whatever that entailed doing) and Lucy went up to the dorm. She had no interest whatsoever in Mandrake leaves, Roderick Grinderford, or anything else they might be interested in doing.


	5. Set Your Sights And Set Them High

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place in September.
> 
> The chapter title is from the song "Carried Away" by Dionysia.

The next morning, Lucy woke up early before class started and sat in the common room with a cup of coffee and a book. The book was called _The No-Nonsense Guide to Transfiguration_ , and Lucy was reading it because Transfiguration was, without a doubt, her least favourite subject, and the one she struggled the most with.

The Transfiguration professor, Professor Franzen, was a very kind man, and a good teacher too, but that didn't prevent Lucy from struggling. And it wasn't like she could just drop Transfiguration, either; she wanted to be a Healer, and she needed the blasted subject for that.

Eventually, other people started coming in from their dormitories and Lucy decided that it was time to go to breakfast. She went to her dorm, changed, saw that none of her friends had woken up, shook her head and sighed, and went to eat breakfast.

In the Great Hall she took two bagels and added a pile of sausages onto her plate. She was almost finished the first sausage when Professor Longbottom came around with their timetables. He handed Lucy hers; she looked at it and made a face. She had Transfiguration first off, just what she hadn't wanted.

"Where are the other four?" Professor Longbottom asked, gesturing at the empty space beside Lucy.

She shrugged. "Still in bed, I think. I think they stayed up late last night. She neglected to mention, though, why they had stayed up late: because they were at the boathouse doing drugs. Her friends might be up to no good, but they were still her friends.

Professor Longbottom nodded. "Well, if you see them today, tell them to com to my office so they can get their timetables."

Lucy nodded. "I will, Professor."

Transfiguration turned out to be just as bad as Lucy had thought it was going to be. Professor Franzen walked in at the start of the class, quieted the class of Gryffindors and Ravenclaws, and began talking about the importance of the class. This, Lucy thought, wouldn't have been so bad, except for the fact that it reminded her of the necessity of this class that she didn't do too well at.

"Transfiguration is one of the most important branches of magic you will ever learn," he said, walking up and down the aisle. "If you plan on being an Auror, a Hit Wizard, a Healer, or, to be honest, if you want to have almost any position in the Ministry of Magic, you will need Transfiguration. So, unless you're planning to live in your parents' basement for the rest of your life you should pay attention in this class." He stopped pacing and stood looking at them. "That means that if you are in this class I expect you to try. I expect that you will come to class and come prepared at that. If you are here to fool around you should leave now."

Nobody moved.

"All right, then," he said, clapping his hands together, "now that the dreary first day speech is out of the way, now we can start." He drew his wand from a pocket of his robes. "I thought that we would start with some review, to see how much you remembered over the summer."

"Absolutely nothing," somebody muttered from the back of the room. Professor Franzen pretended not to hear.

"So, everyone," he continued, "take out your wands. On the desk in front of you is a pin. See if you can transfigure it into a button."

This, Lucy accomplished, and the few after that, but when they finished the review and came to new material she started to struggle.

At the end of the lesson the bell rang and everybody left for their next class. Lucy, who had a free period, took an especially long time putting her stuff back in her bag. Her pile of half-transfigured objects sat in front of her on her desk.

Seeing that she was the only one left in the room, Professor Franzen came over to her. "How are you doing, Miss Weasley?" he asked, helping her with her books.

Lucy remained silent for a minute and then said, "I don't know, Professor. I couldn't transfigure these properly" - she gestured to the pile on the desk - "and I feel like I struggled with the review, even though I managed to do it."

Professor Franzen nodded. "What do you want to do when you graduate, Miss Weasley?"

"I want to be a Healer," Lucy answered.

"You'll definitely need Transfiguration for that," he said. Sighing a little, he added, "Lucy, would you be interested in a tutor at all? There are one or two people who I think would be able to help."

Lucy shrugged. "Sure," she said. "After all," she added deprecatingly, "I suppose I can't get much worse, can I?"

Professor Franzen laughed. "Now, come on, Lucy, don't sell yourself short here." They walked out of the classroom and he added, "Do you need a note for next period?" When she shook her head no, he said, "Well, all right then, see you Wednesday afternoon for our next class. I'll talk to the people I have in mind for tutoring."

Lucy nodded and left, trying to hide her disappointment. While she had told Professor Franzen that she was open to the idea of a tutor, she didn't want one at all. Lucy felt a bit embarrassed by the fact that someone else had to teach her outside of class because she couldn't learn in-class, when she was supposed to.

It was only the beginning of second period. There was still the whole day ahead of her, and all Lucy wanted to do was go up to her dorm, curl up in her bed, and ignore the world.


	6. You're A Holy Fool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title is a quote from the song "What Kind of Man" by Florence + the Machine.

Lucy spent her free period in the library. After Transfiguration she needed to feel better, and the library always made her feel better. Transfiguration had gone the way she had predicted it would, but not the way she wanted it to. She needed the class to be a Healer. She didn't want to suck at it.

At the end of the period, Lucy checked her schedule - she had Potions next, with the Slytherins - and made her way to the dungeons. When the bell rang, Lucy waited for the previous class to rush out, and then entered. She was the first one there, aside from Professor Slughorn, who was getting rid of what looked like an exploded cauldron.

Looking up once he had cleaned the mess, he beamed. "Miss Weasley! It's wonderful to see you! How was your summer?"

"It was good, Professor," Lucy replied neutrally. She didn't want to mention Roderick Grinderford and Rosalyn in Knockturn Alley when she and Rosalyn had gone shopping. "How was your summer?" she asked, changing the subject.

Slughorn shrugged as the rest of the class came in. "Same as usual," he said.

Finding herself a spot in the middle of the room, Lucy dropped her book bag on the floor beside the cauldron and sat down.

Professor Slughorn moved to the front, by a stack of papers he had yet to do anything with. "Welcome to seventh-year Potions," he said. "This is your final year and therefore, the most difficult of the seven. I will warn you now: this class is a lot of work. Anyone who does not want to put in the hours and time required for homework should leave now." Professor Franzen had said almost exactly the same thing, Lucy thought. Welcome back to Hogwarts.

Slughorn was about to continue when the door flew open. Annoyed at the sudden interruption, Lucy turned to see who it was.

Roderick Grinderford stood in the door, a book bag slung casually over his left shoulder. "Sorry I'm late, Professor," he said, "I was talking with Professor Franzen." Lucy saw that he held a note in his left hand that he extended to Slughorn.

Slughorn took the note, glanced at it, and crumpled it up. "Well, Mr. Grinderford, you can sit beside Miss Weasley there."

Lucy glared at him. Seat partners were for the whole year, and she was sure that Grinderford was not someone she wanted to sit beside for ten months.

Grinderford nodded and made his way towards her. He sat down beside her, dropping his bag on the ground with a thud. He apparently didn't recognize her; Lucy thought that there was no spark of recognition in his eyes, no memory of that day in Knockturn Alley.

She remembered it. Why did she, though? She'd been stuck with asshole guys before, and hadn't thought any more about them other than ignoring them as much as possible and giving them curt instructions when she couldn't.

As Professor Slughorn explained the potion they were going to be making - Wiggenweld Potion - she ignored Grinderford resolutely, focusing entirely on Slughorn. Out of the corner of her eye she could see that he was doing the same thing.

Slughorn finished his explanation and gave them the page number for the potions instructions in the textbook. As Lucy flipped to hers Grinderford leaned over apologetically.

"Could we share?" he asked. "I forgot my textbook in my dorm."

Lucy stared at him, amazed, and not in a good way. "Are you serious?" she asked. "You're late and you don't have your textbook?"

"I was talking with Professor Franzen," he said coldly. "I didn't think he'd talk to me, and I thought I had enough time to run up to my dorm and get my textbook."

"Why didn't you carry it with you?" Lucy replied, just as coldly.

They weren't any more polite to each other as they made the potion. In previous years, Lucy had taken charge and had delegated tasks to her partner; usually things she didn't want to do, like cutting up beans. Grinderford, to her displeasure, preferred to take an equal role. It seemed to her like he was always giving her instructions, and she hated being told what to do. By the time they were done the potion they were one comment away from yelling at each other, or at least Lucy was. She had never known anyone who had annoyed her as much as Grinderford had in the past hour.

The last straw for Lucy came when they were putting a sample of their potion into a flask at the end of the period. She handed the flask in to Professor Slughorn and then sat down, gathering her things into her bag. Grinderford sat beside her, his things already packed away.

"Well," he said, "I have to admit that you're pretty good at making potions - for a girl, that is."

Lucy's eyes narrowed as the bell rang. "Good - for a girl?" she demanded. "What does that mean? Are you trying to tell me that girls are worse at brewing potions?"

"Most of the girls I used to be partnered with were terrible at Potions," he said.

"Well, in case you haven't noticed," Lucy said coldly, "there are girls who are good at Potions. There are girls who are bad at Potions. There are girls who are average at Potions. It's almost like we're all different. Just because girls have vaginas doesn't mean we lack Potions skills, or skill in any other subject." She wanted to hex him. Her wand was in the pocket of her robes. One spell and she'd feel a lot better. "And," she added, "if this is how you regularly talk to girls - assuming that we're incompetent fools until we prove otherwise - you can take your sexism, shove it where the sun doesn't shine, and make Potions by yourself."

She left him standing there in the dungeons as she strode away, clenching her hands into fists in order to prevent herself from drawing her wand. At lunch, she told herself, she would go talk to Professor Slughorn and ask for either a new partner or to be able to work by herself.


	7. Surprise Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title is from the song "Surprise, Surprise" by Billy Talent.

Lucy woke up early the next morning and left her dormitory with her bag in hand, heading down to the kitchen. She loved being in Ravenclaw, but she didn't love the fact that if she wanted to visit the kitchen she had to walk down what seemed like a million flights of stairs to get what she wanted.

She got what she wanted no problem (a plate of toast, which wasn't an issue as it would have been served at breakfast; she was too hungry to wait) and strode into the Great Hall, a smile on her face.

That smile was wiped off when she saw Roderick Grinderford sitting at her usual spot at the Ravenclaw table.

"Why are you here?" she demanded, storming over to him. "This is the Ravenclaw table. You're a Slytherin. You sit over there." She pointed at the Slytherin table for emphasis.

He shrugged. "Just because I'm a Slytherin doesn't mean I have to sit at the Slytherin table."

"What are you doing here?" she repeated, dropping into the seat opposite him like a stone.

"I wanted to apologize for yesterday," he said slowly, as though he had to force out every word.

Lucy's eyes narrowed. "Do you?" She took a piece of toast, deliberately not offering him one.

"Yes." He sounded more confident. "I didn't think that what I had said had been that bad until I talked to Rosalyn. She told me that I should go apologize."

Lucy's eyes narrowed even more. "You're only apologizing because Rosalyn made you?"

"No! Absolutely not!" Lucy had to give Grinderford credit; he looked offended at what she had said. "Rosalyn just told me that what I had said had probably crossed the line."

"Ah," Lucy said non-committally. She would have to talk to Rosalyn later. That was, although, provided that she and Grinderford weren't off doing whatever drug-plant-thing it was she had bought in August.

"It's true!" Grinderford insisted. "Go ask her!"

"I intend to," Lucy said. Then, grudgingly, she added, "Take a slice of toast."

He accepted, surprised.

She got up and left without saying anything to him. He stared after her, confused and surprised.

*

"Rosalyn! Get up!" Lucy shook her again and rolled her eyes as her friend rolled over and slammed the pillow over her ears. "Up! It's almost time for breakfast anyways."

Rosalyn emerged from under her pillow. "I hate mornings," she grumbled.

"So," Lucy said, wanting to get straight to the point, "what did you and Roderick Grinderford talk about last night?"

Rosalyn sat up, her hair sticking up on all ends. "He told me about you and him in Potions yesterday and I gave told him he had been an ass and needed to apologize."

"Ah," Lucy said, sitting down on her bed. "So did he apologize because he regretted what he said or because you browbeat him?"

Rosalyn shrugged, flopped back down on her pillow, and pulled the blankets back over her head.

Mouth twitching in amusement, Lucy stood there staring down at her friend, who was now snoring, for a few minutes before she gave up and got her school bag. Taking her schedule out of a pocket in the side, she looked at it. They had Herbology with the Gryffindors.

Lucy walked out of the dormitory and down to the greenhouses lost in thought. She didn't particularly like any of the Gryffindors, but they were a lot better Grinderford. While there might be a sex joke or two out of the mouths of the Gryffindors - they were teenage boys, after all - they wouldn't be saying any degrading or rude things about women.

Herbology passed with no problems, for Lucy anyways. A Venomous Tentacula bit a Gryffindor girl and Professor Longbottom had to send them to the Hospital Wing, so he let them out early.

Lucy had a free period after Herbology so she walked out to the Black Lake. It was lonely out here, she thought, but at least it was peaceful. There was nobody to bug her here. She could stare out at the calm waters by herself.

Or at least that's what she thought.

"What are you doing out here by yourself?" came a voice from behind her. Lucy inwardly groaned. It was a fitting start to her day to have that voice belong to the person she wanted to talk to least of all in the entire world.

Roderick Grinderford plopped himself down beside her. She glared at him, hoping he would go away.

Either he didn't get the message or he chose to ignore it completely.

"I have a free period," Lucy said coldly. "What are you doing out here? Don't you have class?"

Grinderford shrugged. "I can skip it. I wanted to talk to you, so I followed you out here."

Alone, where nobody would see them. Lucy put her hand around the handle of her wand in case she would need it.

"Have you talked to Ros yet?" Grinderford asked.

"I tried to," Lucy said. "She went back to bed. Maybe it's becaue she doesn't want to talk to you."

"I already talked to her," Grinderford said. "Last night."

Did this boy understand that she didn't want to talk to him? At all? Was he completely oblivious or did he just not care at all?

Lucy stood up and began to stride back towards the castle. Grinderford, caught unawares, took a few seconds to catch up to her.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Back to the castle." Away from him. Maybe she'd go back to the Ravenclaw common room - hopefully he wasn't any good at riddles.

"Lucy, please can you just-"

She wheeled around to face him.

"What?" she demanded.

"I just..." he hesitated for a second and then plunged ahead. "I don't think we started off on the right foot."

That was most definitely an understatement.

He must have been waiting for her to say something because when Lucy simply started at him he looked extremely uncomfortable.

"Could... could we start over? Please?" he asked.

Lucy started at him evenly. "I'll think about it," was what she said. "No" was what she meant.

She left him standing there outside and made her way back to the common room, brain churning. She didn't really want to get to know Grinderford but he wanted to be friends with her. Why?


End file.
